3 februrary, 2020
This weekend I truly found what self-confidence really means. Of course, I have always been saying that self-confidence is what keeps a person going and that person is me. Even though, I would always say this I never really stopped to think about what it really means so I googled it, a feeling of trust in one's abilities, qualities, and judgment. That sounds like everything I have been telling myself. I wake up every morning trying to think of a new way to say that I am good enough and that I am perfect just the way I am and nobody can change that. This seems like it should be how everyone should be, but there is a harsh reality to live that self-confidence is far and between.
For the past week, I have been memorizing a speech I have written for FBLA (Future Business Leaders of America) about strengthening the confidence in me and my work. My favorite line in it is, "Strengthening the confidence in me and my work. It sounds like it should be easy right?". These two brief sentences sum up many people's lives. It sounds like it is an easy concept to grasp, but why is it so difficult for some people to implement it into their lives. Another key point in my speech is that high school or life is the artist and the student or person is the sculpture. I really take this to heart because these everyday things mold you in to your sculpture. Right before I was about to go into my room for these two judges that I will never see again to tell me if my four-minute speech about who knows what is good enough I was talking to a girl. Her name was Catalina, btw if you are reading this heyo!, she had the biggest nerves about having to speak because of her social anxiety. I told her at this point it is a fake it till you make it situation. Think about that for a second. Fake it till you make it. Is that really self-confidence or is that just going with the flow? After I talked to her I went into the room and gave my speech and poured my heart out for these judges, well and a random girl's gym teacher who was my timer, and I prayed that they loved it.
So after living a fun day at my first, well kinda first, FBLA competition I had awards. The moment I had been feeling excited/nervous/about to poop my pants kinda things. After sitting in the stands at some random high school for a little over an hour my category was called, Public Speaking. I stood on that stage knowing I made the top five, but only the top three make it to state and in my speech, I said that I had my heart set on first place. Did the judges actually listen to me? All these other girls in my category kept saying that I did really well, but they also said they are the best public speakers from their schools so I knew I had some tough competition. I stood on that stage just waiting to hear my name. Fifth and fourth were called and I was still on the stage waiting for a place and at this point, I knew I made it to state, but is it really good enough to compete there. Third place was called and I was still on that stage. Second was called and I still stood up there and at that moment I knew I hit a high. FIRST PLACE BABY!!!! My confidence is real. Everything in my speech is a story of my growth and I have confidence while presenting.
So this is my confidence. This is my confidence in my work. Just take a little from my mini story and try to place a little self-confidence in your life. Feel free to contact me to tell me your self-confidence stories.
girl online, going offline xoxo
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